


Irresponsible

by Naomi_Leopardfang



Category: Gravity Falls, Rick and Morty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-29
Updated: 2017-12-29
Packaged: 2019-02-23 14:59:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13192566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Naomi_Leopardfang/pseuds/Naomi_Leopardfang
Summary: Sort of inspired by "Breaking Bad", Rick and Stan dimension-jump to deliver their product to every corner of the universe. Between dodging cops, mixing chemicals, and trying to raise little Beth, their days are never boring.





	Irresponsible

**Author's Note:**

> Dunno what exactly I wanna do with this tbh, but I wanted people to tell me what they think, and where better to do that than the internet? ( Also, I have no idea how to get it to indent, sorry :/ )

Stanley was so tired. Running with Rick had its perks, but it was exhausting. He checked his watch, snorting impatiently when he saw that his partner had been gone for over two hours. If he'd gotten caught again-

As if on cue, the passenger door was thrown open, a slightly panicked Rick hopping in with an overstuffed duffle bag. “Go, go, go!”

Stan smirked, turning the key and taking off as calmly as could be, noting a few cars giving chase behind. “So what happened?”

Rick expertly assembled the unconventional gun from the glove box, glancing around for the ammo. “Same thing as last time, those assholes tried to screw me.”

Stanley casually reached in his pocket and held out an extra magazine of whatever-the-fuck-that-weird-ass-gun-takes. “Sure you just don't know what the market price is?”

“Fuck you.” Rick secured the magazine in place, clipping a strap around his waist before opening the door and leaning out, aiming at their pursuers.

Stan chuckled as he took evasive action, making sharp turns that nearly threw the RV on its side. But he knew this vehicle; this wasn't the first chase it'd been through. He did however nearly hit a street light when Rick's phone went off at full volume.

“Shit, answer it, it's probably her!” Rick blasted behind them, creating a small explosion that affected only one of the cars. Still, it dragged the car sideways, blast area expanding and engulfing the vehicle before imploding on itself, sending a few nearby objects flying.

Stan fumbled with the phone, trying to keep the RV straight as it caught the tail end of the shockwave. “Dammit, why can't you use a fuckin’ normal gun?!” He glanced at the screen to confirm the caller before sliding the icon to the right. “Hey Diane. How are ya?”

“Stanley? Where’s Rick?”

“He’s a little busy at the moment.” Another shockwave hit, and Stan had to struggle not to drop the phone or crash. He cursed under his breath. “Would it be alright if we called ya back in an hour?”

“Not if Rick wants to see his daughter this weekend.”

“Uhh…hold on a sec.” He pressed ‘mute’ before lowering the phone. “Ricky, Diane wants to know if you’re available to see Beth this weekend.”

“Fucking Christ! Gimme the dumb-ass bluetooth thing.” 

Stan reached in the glovebox and pulled out the earpiece, handing it to Rick. The older man pulled himself back in the vehicle for a moment to adjust it on his ear, turning it on. 

“Hey, sweetheart.” He leaned out and fired another shot. “Nah, I’m not too busy.” He released the empty clip, holding his hand out expectantly. Stanley grunted, handing him another. Eventually that bastard was gonna have to learn to keep track of those things. 

Rick continued his conversation. “Just doin’ some paperwork and stuff. Got a movie goin’ in the background.” He finally managed to take out the last car, settling back in his seat as Stanley slowed to a reasonable pace. “There, I turned it down.” He paused. “No, I...Hold on, I dunno about the whole weekend...No, I love her, it’s just tough with work and everything…” He sighed. “Yeah, I understand. We’ll be there Friday. Yeah, bye hon.”

Rick tossed the earpiece back into the glovebox. “Well Stanley, looks like we're in custody of a four year old this weekend.”

Stan snorted. “‘We’? What's stoppin’ me from holin’ up in a motel till Monday?”

“The fact that you won't be able to pay them with anything, asshole. I'm in charge of the money.”

Stan shrugged. “I could probably convince the owner to let me stay for free.”

Rick scoffed. “Gonna suck some more dick, street whore?”

Stanley shook his head, a smile playing on his lips. “Alright, fine. Can't promise no swearin’ in front of her though.”

“Pfft, please, what do you take me for? She already knows all the words, and not to say ‘em in front of Mommy.”

“Of course. What a great Dad.”

Rick grinned, going to the back and coming back with a bottle of vodka. He took a swig, nodding at the open road. “The best.”


End file.
